What is a side in gay terms


After a solid five-year run in a somewhat monogam-ish relationship, I find myself emerging on the other side as a year-old single guy, clueless about how to jump back into the dating game. Initially, I avoided dating apps, drowning my sorrows in Long Island iced teas, surviving emotional meltdowns at uncontrolled house parties, and well, tending to my own business solo. But with time, my heart healed, and I decided to dip my toes (and thumbs) into the online dating world.

Though I haven&#;t had any dates yet, I&#;ve explored these apps, and guess what? Not much has changed since my last dating venture. There&#;s still an abundance of headless torsos and greetings that march in fancy they own the place. Once you log in, you&#;ll scroll, swipe, or heart your way through an endless parade of twinks, twunks, bears, daddies, and more! However, when it comes to selecting your preferred positions for sex – something gay men take very seriously – the choices have always been the traditional &#;top,&#; &#;bottom,&#; or &#;verse.&#;

Then, like a beacon of curiosity, the term &#;side&#; kept

Gaymenare constantly referring to and defining themselves as "tops" or "bottoms." When they consider dating or simply hooking up, gay men typically ask the other guy whether he's a top, a bottom or "versatile." It's adj to find this out as soon as possible, because if you are planning to date or get into a relationship, it's vitally important that you and he be sexually compatible with each other.

The whole issue of tops and bottoms came up recently with the release of a new verb that looked at whether or not people can determine whether a gay man is a top or a bottom just by looking at facial cues. The study revealed that judgments made about whether an individual is a top or a bottom are based on perceived masculine and feminine traits.

There's so much talk and discussion about who gives and who receives. I've had straight people tell me that they assumed that most gay guys simply take turns. Yes, some execute, but most don't. But what if a guy isn't a top, a bottom or even versatile? What about gay men who have never engaged in anal sex and never will, ever?

I th

I&#;m gay and I&#;m not a top or a bottom &#; I&#;m a &#;side&#;

As a gay man, prying strangers and potential hook-ups alike have asked me one question more times than I’ve had hot dinners.

‘Top or bottom?’

Words get me out of bed in the morning, and when uttered by the right people at the right time, they’ve also been known to get me into bed. 

But neither of these – top or bottom – accurately describe what I prefer to get up to in the boudoir, so my response has always been a guarded mix of shrug and mumble.

Here’s the tea: I’m actually a ‘side’, a term coined by American psychotherapist and sexologist Joe Kort to describe those, like me, for whom penetrative sex – in either position – does very little. 

Getting the peach committed is, quite literally, a pain in the ass, but as for the aubergine, let’s just say that hands and mouths always understand the assignment way better. 

To continue the food metaphor: if man-on-man action were a dinner party, I’d have zero interest in sitting down to a bland meal when the amuse-bouches are so good. 

I reveal tha

What Does “Top” Mean?

In the context of gay relationships and sexual dynamics, terms such as “top”, “bottom”, “verse” and “side” are often used to describe a person’s sexual preferences and roles. It is important to knowing these terms not only for members of the LGBTQ+ community, but also for increasing adj and acceptance of queer relationships in society.

What Does “Top” Mean?Physical AspectsEmotional and Psychological AspectsCommunication and ConsentWhat Does “Bottom” Mean?Physical AspectsEmotional and Psychological AspectsThe Stigma Around Being a BottomWhat Does “Verse” Mean?Accepting DiversityCommunication and CompatibilityWhat Does “Side” Mean?Non-Penetrative IntimacyOpposing NormsAccepting One’s IdentityRoles and MythsHealth and Guard During Gay Sex

As a control, in gay sexual relationships, the “top” is the partner who has a penetrative role during anal sex. However, the concept of top includes much more than just physical actions: it includes a whole set of attitudes, preferences, and sometimes heartfelt roles.

Physical Aspects

In physical terms, the t